Activities Where Your Introverted Child Can Win!
Nancy R. Fenn
Parents can be fooled into thinking there's something wrong
with their child for being introverted, especially if they,
themselves, are extroverts. Also many teachers, administrators
and other relatives who are extroverts may not understand
You see, introverts make up a small 30% of the population
and yet their self image is defined by extroverts who think
there is something wrong with them because they "don't' like
people" or because they are "shy" or "withdrawn".
Let's come of age! Introversion is a legitimate personality
type. You can find out more by visiting a Myers-Briggs website
like this one: http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes1.htm
There's nothing wrong with your child if he or she is introverted.
Introverts give energy to others, so your child avoids extended
social interaction not because s/he is anti-social but because
s/he is exhausted by it. All those peppy looking extroverts
who look so happy in the group are actually taking energy
from introverts like your kid when they interact!
The more you understand about introversion as a legitimate
personality type the more you can help your child develop
a positive self image. You may also want to help your child
discover how to "win" in a world set up by "others" with very
different tastes and values.
Introverted children get no inherent value or personal reward
for taking part in past times that are pushed on most kids.
Joining the Pep Squad, taking ball room dancing lessons, joining
the German Club and taking field trips to the aquarium are
not likely to do anything for your introverted child except
stress them out and make them feel like losers because they
don't seem to be enjoying themselves when everyone else is!
It's so important to validate your child's feelings about
these activities and help them understand that it's normal
for introverts to more or less dread them!
The son of one of my clients is a bright, nice looking, musically
talented introvert. He is 14 years old and his extremely extroverted
mother worries because he doesn't have "any friends". She
thinks he isn't "popular". She has pushed him into going to
church dances. When he gets there, he cries. She has taken
him to psychologists to find out "what's wrong" and she has
gotten him drugged with prescriptions.
This is not productive! Instead of forcing a child to do something
that goes so much against his nature he has to be drugged
to do it, how much more healthy and supportive it would be
to provide your child with the right to be just exactly who
Here then are some activities, hobbies and pursuits at which
introverted children excel and which they will enjoy. These
activities are natural to introverts and are all at least
as worthwhile as the Pep Club, maybe more so!
- Collecting (stamps, butterflies, coins …)
- Writing (journals, poetry, letters)
- Pets and training pets
- Playing a musical instrument
- Penpals (especially if they're learning a foreign language)
- Working on props for school plays or other activities
strictly behind the scenes
- Internet projects
- Internet games of educational value
- Sports which do not require a team or partner, such as
long distance running, swimming or rollerblading
- Decorating their room
- Listening to music
- Independent travel
- Practice designing fashions or developing interests in
art, architecture or history (I knew one teenage girl who
loved to do grave rubbings and traveled to Europe to do
this one summer)
- Maintaining the family photo album
- Volunteer work such as working with animals or reading
to the deaf
- Supporting a child from a foreign country with donations,
letters, photos, etc.
In my interviews with introverted adults, the two most common
complaints I hear about the way they were raised was that
they were (1) asked to "go out and play with the other kids"
and (2) told they read too much. Some parents even took books
away or make fun of them for reading.
The best way to make your introverted child a winner is to
make him or her a winner in your own eyes. Learn to identify
and value the introverted qualities of concentration, focus,
self discipline, depth, integrity and self knowledge. It is
without doubt and we know this metaphysically, that there
are no accidents in this world. Your introverted child has
come into your life for a reason!
Quit waiting for them to "turn into" social butterflies. Just
imagine what the world would have missed if Steven Spielberg
had gone outside to play with the other children.
And be of good cheer. The higher up you go in education and
intelligence, the greater the percentage of introverts. Through
history, introverts have made contributions to the world far
in excess of their numbers. While comprising only 30% of the
population, they have furthered humanity in many fields. Charles
Darwin, Albert Einstein, Albert Schweitzer and Mother Theresa
have all been identified as introverts by the Keirsey Temperament
Inventory. Visit Keirsey on the web and learn more at www.keirsey.com.
President George Bush Sr., Bill Gates and Warren Buffet, the
world's greatest investor, are introverts who have recently
made great contributions.
Learning about introverts and supporting your introverted
child during the school years in being consciously introverted
will bring happiness into your home and build a positive sense
of self in your child. Above all, please let your introverted
child have his or her own room and let them close the door
whenever they want. Being alone is their way of restoring
balance and it is quite necessary for good mental and physical
Nancy R. Fenn has been an astrologer and intuitive
consultant in San Diego for over 25 years. She enjoys working
with creatives, intuitives and visionaries to help them discover
their mission in life. Nancy's mission in life is to raise
consciousness about introversion as a legitimate personality
style. Visit Nancy on the web at www.theintrovertzcoach.com
Article Source: www.articlesfactory.com
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